Certified bong polisher and operations engineer. Twelve years experience with water-based pipes and clogged tubes, Ruby-on-Rails, resin, Apache Bong server, Vaporizer, and Java.

Previous job experience:

2005 - 2009
Couch Warmer
Sat on friends couch and surfed the Internet on my laptop.
DUTIES:
polished bongs
washed dishes
edited Wikipedia
Played Team Fortress 2
refilled bongs
built multi-national corporation from scratch, overnight, then dissolved it when patent lawsuit arrived from East Texas.

2000 - 2005
Hobo

1999 - 2000
CEO
GreatEntertainmentPlaceToBuyEntertaining.com
Owner, founder, marketing chief for startup Web site
DUTIES:
Smoked lots of bongloads
Raised $25 million from Dirt Hill
Raised Series B of $560 million from Koal Slaw Ventures

1993 - 1999
Boot Black
SF Market Street
DUTIES
Polished boots

Seeking bongification

ADO, .net C# C++ Java Java Java Java Java Java ruby java python perl bong java perl {LISP} haskell erlang amazon web services cloud sysadmin bonging donging bond HVAC HPVC

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